THe Kitten from Great Brittian!!!

This weekend was filled with various highs and lows each more sweet than the last. The most totally sweet development over the last three days has been the refinement of my pie making techniques.

Like all great men in history, I enjoy the art of making pies with my own two hands while the wife sits in the living room eating Cheez-its and reading about all inclusive Sandals vacations. Last night I experimented with some new ingredients and the resulting baked good lacked a certain something that would make it, well, edible. Ever the optimist however, I put the pie-type object outside with a strong conviction the neighborhood cats won’t find it so repulsive. As of this morning a good bit of it had been eaten by various wild animalia and I expect everything else, including the pie dish, to be gone by the time I get home this evening.

I also purchased myself a sewing machine on Saturday and feel rather strongly that I will be able to figure it out and soon begin making fine garments for fun and profit. As it happens I purchased this device against the advice of two associates who accompanied me on my weekly Saturday pilgrimage for various thrift store treasures. Here are their arguments against the purchase.

Their arguments
1.) When you plugged it in to test it, it did not work.
2.) Not only did it not work but it started to produce smoke.
3.) You’ve never fixed anything including your old turntable that you just
had to replace.
4.) It costs 15 dollars.

I told. them to fuck off and not expect a fine Neopolitan-inspired dinner coat from me anytime soon. As of Saturday afternoon at 3. I have spent 15 additional dollars and countless hours on various buses and trains trying to track down stuff the internet tells me I need to make my 1978 Singer Specialist 476 Zig-Zag swing.

On a sad note, my favorite wooden spoon broke this Sunday past. I was stirring a bouillabaisse while intoxicated and tripped on my apron strings sending the spoon and some bouillabaisse to an untimely demise.