I'm considering a move!

I’ve never understood why I feel so much better than everyone else. It’s weird. Like sometimes, between lines, I’ll be sipping Campari from the cupped hands of some bikini model and I’ll look about my cadre of hangers-on and think: I’m better than anything that has ever existed or ever will exist. To tell you the truth, it’s kind of invigorating. The thrill of omnipotence. The silk pajamas. The pillowfights with fistfuls of college girls falling-.

?: What are you doing in there?
Working Boy: I’m, uh, writing an e-mail to my grandmother.
?: then why do I hear crying?
W.B: Um, because it’s about the Iraq war and broken trust and what not.
?: Listen to you! Since when did you care about politics?
W.B: what are you talking about? It’s always been a passion of mine.
?: Passion? The only thing I’ve seen you get passionate about was those glow sticks they were given away at the Jazz Fest.
W.B: Oh man those ruled. Do you remember how I’d shake them really fast to create cool patterns.
?: I think everyone who was on that bus remembers that.
W.B: Yeah. Anyway quit talking to me, I’m still working.

Over themselves in great piles of pajamas and the occasional stuffed animal. Sure. I give a lot away for nothing, but I expect something in return. The basics: a token title, a spot on the advisory board, a cigar humidor. Is that wrong? No, it’s business. And I know business like I’ve known thousands and thousands of beautiful--

?: Good lord! Did someone die?
W.B: what are you talking about?
?: You started balling the second you went back to typing.
W.B: Um, I wish you weren’t a horrible, jealous liar. Why are you so jealous of me?
?: Jealous of you? This from the man who is afraid to go into the stairwell after 7.
W.B: I told you I’m allergic to shadows! Besides when did you become a gristled old Jewish women with all that: This from a man nonsense? What happened to the Question Mark I’ve come to tolerate and accept as a financial benefit?
?: it died when you decided to start "pursuing bliss."
W.B: I told you, it’s important for my aura. Are you trying to disenchant my aura?
?: Oh goodness no. Heaven forbid I say anything against your life coach.
W.B. Listen I'm detecting some very negative energy emanating from you right now. Maybe you should light some incense and grab a couple glow sticks-
?: Um, I don’t know if your coach told you this but not everything can be solved with glow sticks. W.B:...Sharon warned me about people like you.